


A Surprisingly Fortunate Failure

by literallyeverythingisunfinished



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Gen, M/M, Swearing, Their date is literally the second chapter, Well It's a super villain AU, Who's she?, slowburn?, superhero au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-05
Updated: 2018-02-09
Packaged: 2019-03-14 01:48:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,033
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13583418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/literallyeverythingisunfinished/pseuds/literallyeverythingisunfinished
Summary: Shibayama Yūki's strange story about how he got his first date, and then everything that followed. Heads up, Aliens get involved.Okay to be honest, they're only a minor part of the story.





	1. It begins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lev doesn’t normally go on missions without an older teammates, Shibayama usually works with Inuoka, Kuroo wants Kenma back doing his job and a non-depleting budget, but I guess we can’t all get what we want, which includes a smooth bank heist.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Edited 9/2/18

"This is wrong," Lev mewed, wide eyes narrowing in at the not flashing alarm, arms clutching the riches closer to his chest. Shibayama knew Collar's plans rarely went wrong, but he also knew Lev's instincts sensed trouble like he made it. Collar left these plans in case he was gone, now he was missing from the band of super-powered rouges and so everyone is confused and anything can go wrong at any moment.

"It's not ringing, what could possibly be wrong?" Shibayama Yūki commonly known as Phaser whispered trying to unlock one of the drawers holding the buyer's diamonds, ignoring his hammering heart of doing something definitely illegal, no matter how used to it he was, how intensely the buyer apparently wanted the jewels, no matter how much one stolen set of gems were for a multi-billion corporation that didn’t update their security, or pay their taxes.

He’s also still very confused to why that buyer specifically wanted those jewels, or why he liked Lev or why Armful or Gooman didn't come instead.

"It should be ringing," and Stripers pointed towards something that made Shibayama's pores wet themselves. It was an up-to-date security camera which definitely wasn't on the plan diagram, or matched the ancient interior of the old bank.

"Chemist?" Shibayama said, just above a quiet squeak, "Chemist!"

"Oh sorry, come in Phaser, what seems to be the problem? Over," Kurō voice comes crackling to life over the stolen earpiece radio.

"There's a camera over," Lev gasps, interrupting the line and Yuuki's concentration and dizzying panic because _that was really cute._ It was as if they were in a photo booth instead of a bank holding billions of yen.

"I know we all memorised where the cameras were," the infamous cat burglar/gang leader grumbles, you can actually hear him burying his hands in his face in the dim light of the secret base above Inuoka’s work, “Please tell me Phaser you haven't caught Striper's idiot."

There’s an insulted _hey_ filtering through Yuuki’s ears, quirking his mouth, despite the worry still dictating the imperfection of his breathing.

"There's a camera in front of the vault's door, was there one in front of the door? Over," Shibayama said with desperation, he knew he was going to be made fun of but seriously, he just needs to check. He just needs to be safely tucked in the knowledge of the police not knowing who committed the robbery.

"What?"

"Oh my god, have we missed something?" Lev said more surprised than Yuuki was terrified.

"No? I don't," Kurō says confused, "Oh god, if Compression hears about this I will literally die! Over, remember to say over. Over." He virtually screamed the name of his nemesis.

"We did miss something!"

"Change of plans then Kurō? Over." Shibayama asks trying his best not to give way to his legs in his panic. Not going to embarrass himself. He then realized he gave the Chemist's coveted name away, _did it anyway_.

"Yeah. Phaser, I need you to disable the camera, I know it's normally Collar's job, but he's still somewhere," Chemist breathing is heavier than the lead in his belt and is being stretched like the concept of time.

"No need for much panic, just steal the tape, it's not like the police is going to show up over," Chemist said voice recomposing his calm demeanor.

"How do we know?" Lev pipes up. Shibayama curses the fact Lev was inquisitive by nature, even when he really shouldn't be.

"How do we know Lev?" Chemist's composure crashed into blind confidence, "Because I said so! Let's check police scanners! What do we hear?"

A different voice came from over the radios. Lacking of reverberation, and has layers of crackling.

"There's a 530 going on at Futakachi Bank, threat unknown the JHL assistance has been requested."

Even when the radio was shut off, all three boys still didn't make a word.

"Keep calm," came the words whistling through Tetsurō's teeth, radio's and the two younger boys.

Shibayama began to repeat Kurō like a parakeet, clinging to himself and tucked in like a turtle about to be hit. Lev was in shock confusedly staring at the drawer with the gems in them as if they had anything to do with the colossal fuck up.

"What should we do Kurō," Haiba finally finding the words.

"Codenames dammit! And, and, I don't know! Oh my god as in JLA as with Compression? Compression’s the type of person to be sent on these missions!" Chemist shouted, instead of resolving to punch the screen.

You know it takes a special kind of stupid not to feel pressure. Despite the odds, despite the consequences and despite the disappointment in failure, that stupid would be able to keep you calm.

Luckily Lev was that kind of stupid.

"Should we deal with the police? Over."

It takes seconds they don't have for Kurō to calm down.

"You're right Yuuki, buddy?"

Two seconds pass which Tetsurō just wants to claw right back to him.

"Yes?"

 

"I need you to get the video and prep the getaway car."

"What about the package? Over." Shibayama asks.

"Fuck the package," Chemist spits, "this is probably a goddamn set up that I didn’t take the time to figure it fucking it out! This bank hasn't had an update since the 80's and is an insurance claim just waiting to happen! So who cares!" Chemist starts in a no-nonsense tone he uses to tell Collar to go to bed "Stripers, I want you to do distraction."

"Really!" Yuuki notes Lev's tone goes too cheery and adorable for a guy who's a hundred and ninety centimeters, "Fuck subtle?" He remembers the last time Lev ‘ _fucked_ ’ subtle. “Over?”

"No. And language. Over."

"But you," Lev couldn't finish his complaint because of an awkwardly loud giggle sourced from Shibayama, but when he looked at Lev, expecting the boy's version of 'I'm judging you' stare, he saw pure unadulterated joy. Yuuki would be lying if he said that didn't even make him blush a little bit. He doesn’t know if it’s Lev’s jade eyes or the fear of being jailed that makes him groan.

"Get going, they'll be time to flirt when you get back later, over," Kurō sighed, static pricking their ears. Now they were both definitely blushing. “Hurry up, don’t make me regret letting you to work together, over.”

Lev left the vault too quickly for Shibayama to deny the claims, he wasn't ready to deal with the embarrassment of having a _crush_ , but he had to be ready to deal with the video camera.

 _Source it, destroy it, check it, collect it_ ran through his head like a song on repeat.

He goes underneath the spherical camera. He notes there's not enough room for a tape so it must've been wireless.

He needs to relay that information to Kurō, easy enough.

“Chemist it’s wireless, over.”

“Roger, over,” Kurō replies quickly efficiently, Shibayama could hear the keys tapping in the background. Was the sourcing it step really that easy?

He climbs up the wall by phasing and forming in repeated painful steps.

As he gets close to the camera, _just a minute_ _of the burning, Yuuki hang in there_ , on his mind, _everyone’s depending on you_. Left leg yanking on him and getting stuck halfway up. He can’t help the tears bursting from his ducts.

 _Keep calm_ , his body was starting to convulse from physical exertion and the fact that sandstone just hurt so much to phase through and to grip on to with the molecules weak molecules of his muscles.

He kept going just when he could feel his left leg pull itself up.

He finally reached the camera, tears in his eyes and hands going red. Kissing it to distract himself from the torture that came next he shoved his hand through to the base trying to ruin the mechanics from the inside to out.

He did it. There was a crunch and he could feel gears and cogs fall to the bottom of the dome and painfully ripping through his palm.

"I got it," he whispers, pulling out his surprisingly wet palm from the device. He doesn’t normally sweat this much. Does it matter if Collar’s just going to steal the evidence, once they found him?

"Good job Shibayama remember don't let go to suddenly," Chemist chimed in, he then heard an aggressive hiss, “don’t be so obvious, take out the officers covertly Stripers, fuck why does your name sound like shitty candy!”

He let go suddenly, with a smile on his face to the sound of a gently whispered _somebody else chose it_. Detaching himself from a solid state to a heavy gas, like the sensation of letting go of rope.

He fell to the bottom of the wall and phased through the floor, hearing the crack of the earpiece. He could feel himself going hazy like his mind. Instinctively he solidified his feet ever so slightly to stop himself.

He sat up, through sandstone tears streaming down his face, he forces himself forward and prays he’s pseudo standing through the sandstone and reaches. He feels the sensation of dunking his right arm into a cool bucket of water, thankful that it was really easy finding the surface.

Completely solidifying his hand on the surface of the ground he pushed himself up and up until he was free of the ground, and just let his state return to normal. He's laying down, panting, throbbing, his hands and feet were bright red, like blood. Was he bleeding out? He thinks he can feel the earpiece on the back of his head.

As he closed his eyes leisurely staring at the hopefully broken video camera. Questioning if he was useless to the Nekoma Troupe, reminding himself he did forget the last two steps turning this low level case into high-level failure.

 

As the regret and self-loathing filled his stomach he closed his eyes.

**000**

_The night sky is a nice thing to wake up to_.

That's what Shibayama Yuuki thought as he observed the starless city's night sky on his back. All he knew and cared about was somehow, miraculously he wasn’t seeing the ceiling of a hospital, a jail or the testing labs of the JHA. Maybe Lev, Taketora, Kurō or even Inuoka got him out of the bank. _Hopefully it was Lev though, because that meant he probably didn't care about Kurō's flirting comment_ , he thought, hands rushing to his face, _probably meant the others didn’t mind him skipping the last two steps, thank god, next time he’s going to do it for sure_. 

"Hey you're awake!" came the voice belonging to Shibayama’s man of the hour. He sounded peppy like he had some kind of surprise that was somehow better than a successful mission.

"What's going on Lev?" Shibayama asks.

“Nothing much! You look like you recovered from your molecules-in-the-wrong-place whole thing and guess what! I’m not so tired! We’re laying low away from base, on deserted rooftops while Kuroo with Taketora and Fukunga are stealing the tapes and planting false evidence, do you know what laying low away from base entitles?”

 

Shibayama was pretty sure he wouldn’t be able to guess what Lev was thinking, "no."

He looks around, and then gives Shibayama a wide, a little creepy grin.

"Undercover dates," his voice was low but shaking in excitement, and he was definitely beginning to blush.

Shibayama can't help but let out an honest and giddy laugh, “let me pick up some clothes and get changed.” He failed but he’s pretty sure he’s succeeded in other things before. Next time he’ll do it better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really like these two so I'm writing a fun au so you guys can enjoy them too.


	2. Finding a Missing Persons is Great

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The date gets cut short.

Yūki knew he and Lev looked ridiculous, but he’s pretty sure it’s the only way to bypass recognition technology, if not then he spent all this time sticking rainbow stickers and painting vibrant makeup on his face for nothing.

So far today they had: gone to an arcade and won a giant black and white plush kitty, be stared at by a group of cosplayers, visit a manga store with the cosplayers and pick a volume of jump and avoid several security guards.

“All I’m saying is that this Tigger themed hoodie is not to be underestimated by how warm it is despite how worn it looks,” Lev’s excitedly pointing to the words ‘ _no-one else quite like me’_ in black bold, with smiling jade eyes behind even darker sunglasses.

Shibayama laughs and he doesn’t even know why exactly. Maybe it was because Lev was just so gosh darned excitable he thinks as he sees Lev’s ‘ _I’m so happy to be here_ ’ face re-orientate to one of his more ‘ _I sees something_ ’ faces.

“Hey Shibayama let’s get ice cream!” he gasps like ice cream was a big deal, “cause I think I see Kenma!”

“Kenma,” Shibayama repeats. You could almost tell from his tone that he didn’t think Kenma, who had been missing for a month after a run in with the JLA as Collar, would be at an ice cream parlor. Except there was a boy, with hair like Kenma’s, with blond ends and dark roots, with a short boy and a much taller boy flanking him.

“Lev, that’s not Kenma because Kenma is missing, let’s not attract attention to us,” Yūki whispers, yanking on Lev’s hand nerves being emboldened due to being on the outside of the mall.

“Virtually no-one’s there. If we don’t know it’s Kenma, then we’ll ask him if he’s Kenma,” he said as they were hovering outside the colorful shop of pink and blue.

“Lev, Lev,” Shibayama was trying his best to imitate a fly in order to get the tall boy’s attention. The bell announced their entrance the building and the three patrons turned to look at the boys, and Shibayama knew it was Kenma.

Kenma looks so disappointed, making a face like he caught a goldfish at a festival, but found out it was already dead. The two unknown boys however probably realized that a cosmic worthy coincidence just happened. On their phone screens.

“Kenma,” Lev whispered and a huge grin was on his face.

Kenma was clearly mumbling something, the embarrassment he was feeling was affecting the strangled smile on his reddening face. The ginger haired shorty looked at him and then smiled at the boys.

“Hey you guys what flavors do you want?” he asked, as if Shibayama and Lev actually knew who he was, “I’ll treat if you save us seats.” The restaurant is emptier than the expression of the tall, black haired boy trying to get a handle of the giant cat Yūki was clutching.

“We’ll share a giant ice-cream Valentine Sundae, with vanilla and chocolate and strawberry!” Lev said grinning like a maniac, “Trust me, it’s delicious!”

Yūki adds with a nervous giggle, “And two hot dogs with mustard please. We haven’t had lunch yet.” Kenma was staring at Shibayama like he had just admitted that his type was hyperactive idiots, although some may say that was a fair assumption, considering his best friend was the actual embodiment of pure joy.

It was weird shuffling around choosing a conservative but big enough booth under everyone gazes (including the smiling girl behind the counter), especially because Lev kept on making a big deal that he’s never came here before.

He has been here before, they were trying to catch Kurō’s nemesis, the do-good Compression. The end result was a trashed parlour.

Kenma sat down with the two boys. The missing old friend faced the boys, they could tell he was furious by the scrunch of his face. Kenma could tell, they could tell he was furious because they looked like they had thrown a vial of acid on a defense attorney’s face, accidently.

“I saw your heist,” he starts.

“That was you guys? I couldn’t tell! I’m Hinata this Kagrmupyama,” smiles the ginger boy with Kenma. Even Lev let out a small _really_.

 “Quiet scrub,” he growls making the ginger shiver, he’s now facing the boys, glaring threateningly, “And it’s Kageyama.”

“Why didn’t you help us out if you saw our heist,” Lev yells as if the attendant wasn’t only just in the kitchen, “but more importantly did you say scrub?”

“We saw it on TV, you guys are on notice, you should be at base, not here,” Kenma hisses with venom.

“Lev said we can’t go back to base,” Shibayama said, listening to his own words and pausing for the first time, after a sugar rush breakfast, crane games, an empty movie theatre him and Lev just talked through. Just thinking about it made him feel _giggly_ _and light_.

Everyone was looking at Lev now. The boy is sweating.

“You’re not meant to know,” Lev said as if Yūki had a terminal sickness.

“Lev you idiot,” Kenma startled eyes narrowed into cat like slits.

“There’s a GPS stuck in Shibayama’s arm!” he whimpers, “Kurō’s trying to figure out how to get it out but for now we’re meant to be in crowded places.”

“GPS?” Kenma’s eyes bounce back to blown out pupils. The air goes cold and Hinata eyes start to glow a dim amber, and Shibayama feels like he’s about to phase through the firm cushions of the seat.

“Then why is he with us?” Kageyama said, a little less angrily than when he was introducing himself.

“Compression didn’t realize that it’s range wouldn’t be very good once Shibayama condenses so we’re to stay in crowded places so, just in case. So here we are!” he smiles everyone just stares at him. He looks around in the fairly empty ice-cream parlor and puts on a pompous expression with the words ‘ _we’re below a MacDonalds_ ’.

“Shō, can you go get our food to go?” Kenma has recollected himself eyes returning to their normal state. Shibayama begins to hate that _giggly_ feeling.

“Sure Kenma,” he says, his smile now looks like he’s about to die in a cult he’s not quite sure he’s okay with. Hinata goes up to the counter, animatedly apologizes to the waitress and returns with ice cream.

Kenma gets up, only to be stopped by a panicked ‘ _the lady said we have to wait for the Valentine Sundae and hotdogs_ ’ and a following less self-congratulatory ‘ _can I go to the toilet?_ ’ from Lev.

**000**

_To be fair to Lev_ , thought Lev to Lev, _Kurō did say to keep Shibayama in public places_. He flushed the toilet, and exited the stall. He still can’t help but feel like he ‘ _done fucked up_ ’. There was another patron outside waiting for him to leave the stall, Lev saw the JLA armband, realized he was awfully short he was.

“ _Excuse me_ ,” grumbled the no longer mystery patron in a tone so familiar it was ingrained in his mind, echoing in his ‘ _things to sort of fear_ ’ section.

Turns out Compression’s GPS worked enough, and Compression was just naturally short without activating his ability.

Maybe he shouldn’t run out of the restroom into the waitress, causing everything to spill out of her arms like a water from a balloon bursting and a scream to be ripped from her throat.

“Sorry Miss! Kenma! Kenma! Compression’s here,” he said all at equal volume, slamming his hands onto the table as rushed as the speed he ran to the table.

“What? No, we have to move now,” at half the volume, eyeing the waitress now ducking behind her counter and pulling out a bedazzled notebook and a cloth. Hinata and Kageyama jumped up except Kenma pulled them down.

“Wait,” Kenma said fixating on the distance and whispers, “Stay, in the booth, that’s a signature book. How about we set up a little trap.”

“How?” Yūki says finally gathering his courage, he’s as pale as sheet and Lev just wants to wrap him up in his arms and assure him they’ll do just fine.

“Lev stay in the back,” Kenma whispered, “Yūki dense up, Lev you’ll need to carry him. Shō, Kageyama what was that blast called?” Shibayama closes his eyes and he shrinks a little, and becomes hard and hot to the touch as Lev brushed against him.

“Sundrop?”

“No, the windy one? The windy _destructiv_ e one. And remember to keep it down the waitress can’t hear us but if we draw too much attention she will see us, and in turn.” Kenma was interrupted.

“Got it lie down. The windy one, Tornado Tower,” Kageyama answers with a _woosh_ coming from _Ginger-And-Excited_ , “Okay dumbass, I need to borrow your body.”

“This part is weird,” Hinata grins, and Shibayama must’ve agreed with them because they took off their shirts as they lie down and he let out a small squeak. Hinata was now clinging to Kageyama’s back like he was a parachute and Kageyama’s life depended on it.

“ _Ma’am I may have to request you to leave the building the JHL believe there are some dangerous individuals here,”_ the first half was polite but you could hear the confusion in his voice in the, _“my signature… I apologise all the signatures you have are from Lucifer and his various phone numbers. Yes it does happen way too often but tracking him via phone has yet to not, not work… Yes we are aware we are incompetent by not being able to catch someone equally incompetent_.” Then the conversation stopped because what Kageyama seemed to be holding down against the couch was starting to pull chairs and napkins towards them.

“Aim for outside,” Kenma whispered, almost losing the words to the growing sound of wind. That’s when a tornado no bigger than a chair, was pushed from Kageyama, growing until it hit the front of the shop, bursting the window open and raining glass onto the complex and out onto the road smashing into a car and whipping it around and dissipated on a closed laundromat across the road. The price of denting the building across from the mall. It was a tall building with several floors above the front, probably with people in them.

“Shit!” Compression yelped, “Sorry Ma’am.” You could hear his rapid steps as he passed the booth he stared at the boys and was probably giving them an ugly glare underneath the crimson and white mask.

With the signal to go from Kenma, Lev picked up Shibayama and ran and jumped through the destroyed window. Hinata and Kageyama were already and had their shirts on and Lev realized just how grey they were.

“We could’ve destroyed a building,” Kageyama growled, “Was that you’re plan?”

“Maybe he didn’t realize it,” Hinata replied only to need an explanation as well, “Kenma?”

He gives all the boys a look like he didn’t just told Kageyama to shove a dangerous tornado into a building, “It’s a JLA safehouse, and did you have to weaken the tornado? We needed that bounty.” Kenma starts running and all the boys easily catch up to him, Lev noticed that apparently the ginger could beat Lev in a foot race.

In fact Kenma’s lack of physical ability compared to the other boys becomes obvious when the boys are making awkwardly controlled strides to not go in front of Kenma.

 “Why don’t we carry Kenma, he can fit in the shorty’s hoodie can’t he?” Lev asks, spurred by the adrenaline waiting to be used.

You can tell how much Kenma hates physical exertion more than fueling Lev’s ego, he agrees swiftly, and asks Hinata for permission to rest in his hoodie.

“We’ll have to find an alley for Kenma to change,” Kageyama suggests, “Maybe I should carry because I’m faster than him.”

“No you’re not!”

They duck into an unsavory alley and Kenma is already holding onto Hinata in only his Love Life themed boxers.

“You guys have done this before?” Yūki asks, at least that’s what Lev thinks he asks.

“Hinata has, he and Kenma were cellmates in the JHL,” Kageyama looked bitter picking up Kenma’s stuff. Yūki makes a three syllabled sound that could almost be a sound of unprofessional surprise rather than the ‘ _JHL?_ ’

“JLA, that’s where you were Kenma?” Lev asks, “How are you out?” Kenma can’t answer. He already lifted himself up, shrinking and growing fur, and like a type of super condensed evolution you see on TV going in reverse, he was now a small monkey.

“We accidently blew it up,” Hinata gives a nervous smile but begins running out starting both Kageyama and an excited Lev, so glad he wasn’t the only one who didn’t have much control over his powers. Kenma quells the communication problem by monkey tapping on Hinata’s left shoulder, indicating left.

They went a variety of rights, lots of lefts, walking past a police officer very casually after monkey-nma virtually choked Hinata to slow down, and then, left, right, right, left and then Hinata went right into a gate. They patched Hinata’s nose inside Kenma’s house, _because apparently Kenma has a house_ Lev thought about the small rickety house, cultivating shadows and suspicions, ill-suiting the sterile neighborhood.

After several attempts from Kenma to gesture to the other boys to wait here failed, freaking Hinata out with strangled monkey noises. Shibayama had to explain as he lay stiffly on the couch. Lev’s attention was on the fact that Kenma had so many video games. Kageyama was staring at the figurines with poses from a super serious _Cloud_ to a tripping _Chibi Miku_ in a glass display case. He of course didn’t know who any of these characters were.

There were other things a red couch, red and white bean bags, a coffee table that if it had been scaled up could’ve been a good prop for something needing King Arthur’s round table, and pictures lots of pictures. Lev spent the first five minutes looking at them and then showing Yūki, comments causing the hint of a smile to appear on his face.

**000**

Shibayama looks around with his eyes and questions if it was okay to sit up. Lev was trying to see if he could find a photo album which Kurō once off-handedly mentioned containing pictures of baby-age Kenma

He hears someone walk down the stairs, and then pass him, unspeaking, five minutes later he comes outm “You can undense if you want, they’ll figure we’re here sooner or later, Kenma sighs disappointedly, “I’m going to go say goodbye to my figurines and hope to god they give them to an actual collector.”

Kenma didn’t leave the room, instead he slumped against spotless glass and begins kissing it greasy. Yūki thinks he’s crying as he whispers what can be assumed heartfelt _goodbyes_. Kageyama looks like he’s in lockdown. Hinata get’s up and pats Kenma on the back. His attention on Kenma saying farewells to the inanimate was interrupted by Lev’s slurping.

“We’re going to be in trouble with Kurō when we contact him again, aren’t we?” between mouthfuls of his own cup ramen.

“Who’s that?” Hinata sits down, he’s clearly curious brown eyes going wide eyed, and frosting over.

“The Chemist, I don’t know if you’ve heard of,” Yūki replies quietly, unsure of what exactly he can disclose between mouthfuls.

“You guys work with the _Cats_ as well,” Kageyama joins in the conversation, sitting in a position much to eager for, what Shibayama can assume, an eighteen-year-old boy.

“Yep,” Lev says, mouth full of the last bit of soup of his noodles.

“What's he like? Kenma says Chemist is an idiot,” Hinata questions.

“Everyone’s an idiot according Kenma though,” Lev bluntly states. Yūki replied the statement with a meeker snicker.

It caused all the other boys to stare.

A cutesy song plays out into the room, with a more cutesy singing voice entrancing the boys. It grabs Kenma’s attention and he scurrys towards it, he comes back in to the room holding a wireless mobile and he was mumbling into. He was in a hurry to get back upstairs. It put everyone on edge, to say the least.

He came back down grabbing cases, taking out discs and cartridges and placing them into a Pokémon themed compact case, he looked at Yūki scrunched his face up like Yūki was going to object to his unusual actions and turned back to whatever he was doing.

“Is it just me or does Kenma scrunch his face up more around Lev?” Kageyama grunted.

“I know right! Kenma you hear that! Kageyama noticed!” Hinata said, directed at the boy running up one end of the house to the other.

Neither an insulted Lev or impressed Shibayama knew what Kenma had replied with, they didn’t care, they were amazed Kenma _could reply_ to a _meaningless statement_ when he was _clearly busy_.

Their mouths were still gaping when the doorbell rings, Hinata bounds over to it.

“Hinata wait!” Kenma squeaks, Hinata slips over and crashes into the door. He looks momentarily disappointed. “Kageyama.”

“Yes?”

“Get ready to fight.”

“Okay,” and with that the room gets warm, like someone’s turned on the metaphorical stove.

“Go closer to the door way,” Kenma hisses, “you and Shō are going to have to take out,” and before he can finish the door shatters, blowing Hinata into the stairs with a heavy ‘ _thud_ ’ and scattering wood chips. The singing is louder, and Yūki thinks he should check it out. Kageyama runs outside.

“Wait,” Kenma mumbles, shaking, “Oh crud, just go, go. You guys are going to have to take out at least two JLA Supers. I’ll try and think of something, take out Siren first. Go.”

Yūki loosens up and looks for something he can use as a make shift weapon. He chooses a long and loose piece of Kenma door, walks outside to the singing and sees a young lady, and a silver haired man. The lady was singing a cutesy pop song he wasn’t familiar with. Maybe he needed to get closer to make out the lyrics.

The man next to her gestured him to come and sit with them. Them being Kageyama who appeared to be sitting down crosslegged handcuffed by some strange device. ‘ _Weird_ ’ it occurs to him and continues towards the singing lady.

The silver man’s about to start talking, but Lev yells ‘ _cowabunga_ ’ and leaps to the singing lady, she barely dodges, her luring song faltering and it occurs to Shibayama that Sirens lead people to their doom by singing. Kageyama was still sitting patiently. He raises his make shift weapon and the silver haired man lifts up his cloak to reveal his JLA uniform and unbalances both Lev and Shibayama with a very strong gust.

Kageyama looks confused and burns through the device catching both Siren and, who must’ve been the rumored, Breezy off guard.

He then looked at a Breezy who was trying to placate him before he even started, “Hey there hold on why don’t you just take a minute and,” he then continued, suggestion slowing Kageyama. Siren then got low to the ground and took up a fighting stance, voice picking up speed and Yūki tries to figure out how to tell her she has a lovely voice.

He pauses for a moment, like a student who thinks he’s noticed a spelling mistake of a complicated word on the the English teacher’s slideshow. He then walked forward to the silver haired man beckoning him; as he reaches the man with the really nice smile he hears a scream of agony, fear and general loudness from behind him. His head snaps back and he sees Lev who was also looking back at Hinata, wearing headphones and brandishing snowballs.

Next thing he knew Kageyama was yelling, “at her dumbass, get better aim!” Siren’s singing faltered and then like a name of an old friend hitting him, he hit her across the face with the door splinter he was holding.

“Tackle them!” Hinata screamed a little less ‘I’m being murdered’ like, punctuated by the sound of something thumping, and it wasn’t his meat sack. Shibayama saw clothes surrounding a washing basket as if it had exploded.

Breezy, leapt into a coughing fit, cloak hiding his white uniform billowing in the clothes direction.

“Well I guess you two are the real,” a grimacing Lev kicked Siren who was trying to hold the gash across her cheek and nose, “stinkers!” Not getting a moment to be proud of the kick that caused Siren to roll backwards, because she was on her feet once she finished the roll.

She was already barreling for Yūki, quickened by the tailwind Breezy must’ve whipped up. He didn’t want to be kicked by her air kick, so he let his chest dissolve. She kicked through him and took his clothes with her. He then felt himself be blown a little bit back, a lot more. He solidified, shirtless, confusing both Breezy and Siren.

Kageyama took the moment to set Breezy’s cloak on fire, and Lev flopped onto Siren. Breezy took a little longer to put out his cloak, while blasting Kageyama with solid puffs of air, than Siren, who just flipped Lev onto the ground, stamped on him sending him into a coughing fit and went for the source that was pelting her with snowballs.

Kenma must’ve thrown several plastic things onto the ground, because it looked like he was crying, after a muffled clatter hit the ground and a group of objects wrapped in newspaper appeared. Then something wooden rocketed out of the window and was blown off course behind Breezy, who was wrapping Kageyama’s head in the on the singed cloak. Kageyama caught it alight, again, and forced himself so far forward that it followed him when he ripped it and he body slammed Siren.

He scrabbled up, and she yanked back down flipping him over and landing a punch in his covered face. She looks up, grabs her goggles and pries them temporarily away from her, a little water falls out and she fixes them back in place.

Her singing is shaky when she starts, and abruptly stops when an overnight bag falls from Kenma’s room. Kageyama’s staggering in her direction again and she punches him, knocking him flat and she starts hastily singing.

“Is he even trying to hit us?” Breezy says, frown on his face. The pile of clothes that landed on Hinata, who must’ve been trying to build a snowball, answered. Hinata dropped the snowball onto the ground with a yelp. Even flattened, making Hinata’s shoes sopping wet. It was much bigger than the ones he made before.

Siren kicked Hinata in the groin and he collapsed onto the snow and Kageyama, Breezy began cuffing Lev who was groaning. Now it was a huddling Yūki’s turn.

Then an obnoxiously colored cloth flew out of Kenma’s window and was whipped around by the wind, dragging it slowly, and fast and then as it was lifted one last time. It gained the shape of a person, rolled onto the ground, picked up a bat and then knocks Breezy out, like an action star. It is Kenma, a Kenma who looked like he was trying to get the last limited edition figure in a crane game with only 300 Yen left.

He then sprays a sprawled Siren with thick purple gas. She falls.

Yūki offers a groaning Lev his hand, he accepts it, and groans all the way Yuuki pulls him up.

“You guys have heard of Lucifer right?” Everyone had. “You guys know the obnoxious van he drives around in?” Everyone’s seen it. “Look for that, he’s our ride home.” He sweeps up a overnight bag onto his back puts on a hoodie walks out onto the sidewalk.

Hinata stands up, and darts out to try and reach him, calling his name. He looks back and stops. He looks at the house, he was leaving behind. It prompts Shibayama to do the same; this time he thought about it too. About the living room with the well-worn couch filled with knick-knacks that must’ve cost a fortune. He thinks about the two pairs of bean-bags and the photos on the lounge room table. He looks back at Kenma and tries to figure out what to say to cheer him up.

Then a circle swirling with various shades of black appears behind Kenma. It didn’t make a sound when it came and it didn’t make a sound when the same black came spilling out of it. Something was emerging black and solid.

The black slowly slipped off of the thing that was coming out of it. It’s only honest description would be is that it was garish. A familiar garish with a recognizable pattern on the tires that finally revealed themselves.

No wonder they couldn’t catch Lucifer.

The car hit the ground, making a noise that was very unpleasant for Lev, not aided by what must’ve been the horn making a rapid fire melody that sounded like ‘ _pop goes the weasel_ ’. It was something to stare at with wide eyes and agape mouths, in fact everyone but a pained Kenma did it.

The back-doors busted open and Kurō in all his bed headed glory poked his head out, “get in losers!” Lev dashed past, groaning punctuated by ‘ _ow_ s’, and Yūki followed. Hinata jumped in not long after Shibayama had crawled in. Kenma only just beat Kageyama who was trying to figure out what the van’s smell was.

A clear voice cut through whatever curiosity Shibayama had for the neatly secured piles of paper, new text-books and very old text-books written in strange languages, similar to English, “Hey careful of the books, they’re real expensive. Hey Mister Chemical Dealer I thought you said there would be three?”

“Does that really matter?”

The man in front stops and twiddles the earring in his ear, “I guess not.” He honks the horn and drives forward. Yūki hears a group of words leave his mouth, like someone had left a recording of their own voice saying gibberish, planted a speaker in his mouth and let it play out from there. However, he did it, the same portal from before had appeared and dipped into the road. Kurō went to close the van’s doors, Yūki sees Breezy out on the street, spreading his arms, the van’s doors slam shut.

As they approached the circle, the van slowed down. The portal’s tendrils reached for it, grabbing hold of the hull, Kurō got on his knees and looked though the back window.

“Yeah he’s running right at us.”

Shibayama went to look too. True to Kurō’s word Breezy was running right at them, closer and closer. He then leapt at the van slamming himself onto the back door. The anguish on his face giving away the fact he very much regretted that decision. He then began fiddling with the backdoor.

“Yo Lucy!”

Lucifer looks back, Shibayama sees his dyed blonde hair and an open mouth revealing a tongue piercing, “that isn’t good.” He’s then waving his hand in front of his neck. “Somebody needs to tell him that if he doesn’t get off the voids going to eat him.”

“What?” Lev’s the quietest he’s been all day, and as if on cue the dark tendrils from the portal began fondling with Breezy’s hair. Lucifer made ‘ _om nom_ ’ noises. It pulls at him and he sees him jump off the van, and try to pull out of the tendrils like a man with a noose around his neck with the other end of the rope attached to a bowling ball, about to go off a cliff.

The last Yūki sees of him is him trying to pull free of his forearm, which had been completely engulfed, before the tentacles swallowed up the van.

“So it’ll take roughly three minutes to get you to ReGrow,” he says directed at Kurō.

“We’re not going to homebase?” Lev asks punctuating the ‘ _not_ ’ and ‘ _home_ ’. Still clutching his chest.

“No unfortunately Yūki here might have a tracker in his arm. ReGrow organized a safe house we can get to that’s impossible to pick up signal. Bluescreen designed it.”

“Oh yeah,” Lev looks at Yūki, Yūki swallows and wonders how to cheer him back up, Lev smiles, “at least we’ll be able to get rid of it without the JLA breathing down our neck.” He then breathes heavily, “Yūki we are here to take you away to our paradise, where you walk all day, never see sunlight, but will be able to see .1 girls.”

Yūki snorts, “don’t tell Taketora.” He feels his smile grow and feel like it’s fixed permanently to his face as a wide, goofy grin.

“.1 girls? Wait for me JLA!” Lev says in a voice much deeper than his natural tone. The grin on Yūki’s face is never going to leave now, as Lev's smirk communicates exactly who it was meant to be.

“Who is that meant to be?” Kenma asks.

“Aw don’t be mean!” Lev’s voice goes a little higher, with bubbling excitement, “it’s Taketora, you remember him.”

Kenma takes a moment, “who?” He smirks as Kurō chortles, he then notices Hinata who looks more lost than a puppy who’s trying to figure out how to chew _both_ toys that were already to big for his mouth. Kageyama looks like he’s focusing on an algebraic question outside the black window.

“A guy we work with. Loud, energetic and annoying. He’s superhuman strong.”

“So Hinata without the strong bit.”

“Eh, he’s more annoying than Hinata,” he thinks for a moment, “he’s more aggressive, always ready to fight.”

“Like Kageyama.”

“I’m not always ready to fight!”

“Are you sure?” Hinata stretches out the word ‘ _sure_ ’ for so long that Kenma could’ve completed seven eye rolls. It amused Yūki that he didn’t.

“Ready to get your ass kicked!” he grumbled, without a hint of irony. The silence that followed also didn’t indicate any self-reflection.

“Ready to get my ass kicked?” Hinata smirking, and Kenma’s trying to hid a smile as he looks outside.

“Yeah.” Kageyama stops, “wait.”

Lev laughs and Kurō berates him, and pulls ut something and stabs his chest with it, “trust me it’s neccesary.” Lev moans about how it still hurts after he pulls it out, “six to ten hours Lev, deal.”

Lucifer looks back, “Hey hoes.”

“I just wanted to know how bumpy do you want this exit to be, smoother than my pick-up lines or?” Lucifer trailed off like he wanted them to say ‘ _or_ ’.

Kenma stares at Kurō as he says, “we’d very much like to be alive.” Lucifer hums like he understands, and then it gets a little bit bumpy.

“We’re going to die and it will be your fault Kurō.”

“Wow break my heart will you?”

“It’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make.”

Lev puts his hand on Kurō’s suit jacket, “It’s okay Kurō, because it’s so small it’ll grow back quickly.” Kurō stared at Lev as if he had just knifed him, Kenma was trying to resist the urge to laugh and put his hand on Kurō’s shoulder too, and rested his head. “What?”

“Shibayama, captain’s orders, you aren’t allowed to date Lev.”

“You're not the Boss of us!”

“It’s literally my job description, I took you in,” Kurō sounded fake scandalised, “How could you do this to me!” The ‘ _me_ ’ went a little higher than expected as Kurō went a little higher than expected. “I said alive Lucy!” He sounds like he’s having fun, but he had the eyes of a man staring into the abyss he was going to fall into after being pushed out of a plane, his only choice was fall slowly with a parachute, or just fall.

They sped up.

“Yeah you’ll be alive. Alive and having fun! Chill,” the real world revealed itself like someone had yanked all the void off of the van in one swift motion, like a magician, “out!” They landed with an ‘ _oof_ ’ and stopped with a screech, and being lightly assisted by a wall. Lucifer stands up, “good news. Chassis wasn’t crushed.”

Yūki could tell they were in an underground parking lot. When Kageyama opened the door and Hinata went to grab fresh gulps of air, he could smell they were in an old underground parking lot.

“Well that was something,” a voice reverberated of the walls, almost amused. Lev points at the source. Three well dressed men were standing in a trio waiting for them. The second tallest and centre one stepped forward, “Chemist, I thought you said your specialty was subtle?”

“Your recommended driver is kind of the deciding factor on loud and rambunctious entrances.”

“What up!” Lucifer opened the door, and walked towards them with open arms.

“Lucifer can you, sit down for three seconds. And shut up.” Lucifer makes a small noise of disappointment and jumps back in, and turns on some music. Yūki notices it’s baby metal. Yūki also notices as Kageyama makes a conscious effort to hide his face. He notices this as he slips out of the car, Hinata already in front of the man who was speaking earlier, and Yūki walks with part of his actual troupe to them, supporting a limping Lev.

Hinata looks back, makes an upset face, and yells louder and clearer then anything else Shibayama heard from him, “Kageyama! Hurry up!”

This was a mistake, capitalised by both men on either side of the speaker pulling out guns.

Speaker looks at Chemist, “Kurō Tetsurō, what the fuck is this?”

Kurō shrugs smiling, “I have no clue man.”

“Kageyama’s defected,” Kenma answers.

Speaker was literally going green, “Really?”

“Pulled out the tracker from his shoulder and everything. Kageyama,” Kenma moves his head. Kageyama takes a slow walk from the van to them, one of the men who wasn’t speaker growls. Kenma gestures towards his shirt and Kageyama takes it off, receiving what could’ve been an honest whistle under different circumstances.

Kenma points to a scar in his shoulder, much neater than the rest, “The scar he has is from an emergency surgical removal of a GPS. Every agent the JLA has ever owned get’s a tracker implanted into their shoulder. Too risky to remove, so it would look bad if any prisoner ever had it planted and then got a botched surgery to remove it so they don’t do it to most prisoners.” Speaker gestures for the men to lower their guns.

“There’s also this thing, you know the target board boss has hanging in his office?”

“Aw aren’t you the boss,” Kurō was stopped by a pinching Kenma.

Kageyama asked, as if unmoved by the idea that the men were going to shoot him, “Is my picture on the board?”

“Your face _is printed on_ the target board, it costs 20 extra dollars in order to get it custom made,” he runs his hands through his hair and then Yūki realises this is the current boss of Bluecastle, ReGrow. Kageyama just nods, ReGrow’s anger dissipates in frustration. ReGrow points to Kurō, “he’s not going to fuck this up.” He motions the much taller man to pass him something. He shoves a thick pile of files into Kurō’s stomach, “or I’m going to hold you responsible.” He goes to the car opens the door pulls out a pair of keys, throws them to Kenma, and forces smiles “Hey remember, bad customer service for covert internet options is better than no covert internet options! Can’t wait to see our boss! If you can, shoot 214 in the foot for me.”

Kageyama whispers like 214 was him, “that isn’t very nice.”

He drives off with a screech. Lucifer pulls up beside them and tells them good luck. He leaves how he came, too fast and with a good chance he’s going to die.

Kurō walks to where ReGrow’s fancy black car was and accepts the keys Kenma gave him. Clicked a button that was the same colour as the rest of the device. and a perfectly solid piece of concrete became flawed, as heavy grinding filled the room, and revealed a hole and a ladder.

Kurō turned to them and said, like they had a choice in the matter, “Come on guys, I promise we’ll get paid well, it’s a high risk, high reward situation.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first half was written in 2016. I was looking through old Fanfiction and I saw the two pieces. I was like 'wouldn't it be great if I finished this. So here I am.


End file.
